Debian aggression: woman asked about her profession

In my last blog about the DebConf6 assault, I looked at the way the entire DebConf6 population was fooled to believe a dentist was a prostitute.

As it turns out, at least one person felt it was acceptable to walk up to this female dentist and simply ask her if she was a paid dinner date.

The email below also demonstrates the manner in which at least one member of the women's clique, Amaya Rodrigo, was trying to convince Ted's date that Ted might be dangerous. This is a hideous example of backstabbing and sabotage.

While this was 16 years ago, Debian hasn't changed. We can see how easy it was to hoodwink developers with the false accusations that Jacob Appelbaum is a rapist. In 2019, at FOSDEM, the OSI president used her speech to promote a "whisper network". Amaya's email shows us what the "whisper network" really means, soul-destroying tactics deployed for purposes of wrecking a man's personal life.

If people are so gullible and if an organization has no checks and balances in grievance procedures then the organization is putty in the hands of manipulators. These cultural flaws have serious repercussions for the quality and the security of the Debian operating system.

Subject: Re: Ted Walther's Expulsion
Date: Wed, 24 May 2006 14:03:49 +0200
From: Amaya Rodrigo <amaya@debian.org>
Organization: Debian - http://www.debian.org/
To: debian-private@lists.debian.org

Hi all,

Gunnar, I have been giving this whole thing a lot of thought, and I
guess you somehow expect an answer from me. I have skipped the rest of
recipients for my own karma and sanity reasons. 
Gunnar Wolf wrote:
> [ Note that I'm Cc:ing Amaya on this reply, as I know she does not
>   read -private 

I do read private, I wonder where you got that impression from :)

>   Amaya, please share my text with those other people, as it is
>   important to me that my close personal friends involved in this get
>   my appreciation on the matter. ]

Done.

> But I did get quite angry at, and I do condemn, the treatment of the
> situation during the formal dinner. 

I am not particularly proud of my own actions that night. Especially of
the way he managed to bring out the worst in me, the absolutely worst.
Even to the point of irrationality that made me comfront people I call
friends, people I admire, respect and love, like yourself, mooch or
stockolm. 
> The woman who came with Ted was _believed_ to be a prostitute, because
> nobody thought he would have had the time to make friends with locals,
> and nobody took the time to get the hard facts straight. 

I did. I asked your friend Fabio in the most straight manner that I
could and got what I absolutely believed was a positive answer. He later
denied everything, which also fustrated and angried me, even when I had
asked him to warn this lady about what I though was a dangerous
customer, and I was quite explicit to him, and he didn't make any intend
to correct my understanding of the situation, only later did he deny
everything. 
> Some people say this lady was frontally asked whether she was a
> prostitute, question to which she answered affirmatively. Of course,
> given the huge lack of respect to her and to the only person she knew
> in the crowd. 

I talked to the lady very briefly twice, never mentioning the word
prostitute or making any insinuations at all. I also would have found
extremely disrespectful to do so. Whatever her income comes from, she is
a human being to me with full dignity.

The first time i talked to her I explained to her that what was going on
had nothing to do with her, that it was a problem with Ted and that I
believed Ted was a dangerous person and that she should be careful. 
The second time I repeated that it was nothing against her and that she
in fact was very welcome to share our dinner and dance afterwards, that
the issue was exclusively with Ted. 
Both times I talked to her with respect, I especially din't want to
instult her, on contrary. I want to comment on her reaction to me,
though. She looked at me, then at Fabio, then slightly pushed me away
and said something like (I can't recall exactly) "I can't talk to you" or
"I am not allowed to talk to you", which of course only contributed to
make me feel worse, as I read the whole situation as she was not even
there on her own free will.

Of course I think you, Gunnar, are aware that I didn't like Fabio at
all, for reasons that I can clarify is there is any interest. I know he
is your friend, and I am willing to talk about this with you in private.

> I was far too disappointed with the irrational attitude of my friends.

Yes, he managed to bring the worst, most irrational, airated /me I have
been in my life. Am I proud about it? Sure not.

> Next time something insults any of us (because it will happen, that's
> a fact), please try to use your head before it gets to the boiling
> temperature.

Sure, Gunnar. I have learnt a couple of things out of this whole
situation. I think we all have. I expect to never have to face such a
situation in my life, but if I have to, there's a couple of skills I
have learned.

My intention is not to revive this thread, just to clarify that I
treated the lady with respect. 
If anybody has further questions, I am happy (while absolutely unhappy)
to answer. I think the questions can be addressed directly to me. Let's
kill this thread.

If possible at all, I would be happy if this message is not published
when debian-private's archive is made public.

-- 
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